she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
