Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
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