I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
It's official drugs can't kill me
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
