No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
