Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize