Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
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