i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
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I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
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