We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Randomize
