um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
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