sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I need water and some morals
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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