Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
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