yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize
