Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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