After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I was not drunk enough for that final.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
