There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
