He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Randomize
