Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Randomize
