I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
Randomize
