I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
