two words: eviction party
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
