White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
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