Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize