I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
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