I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
