my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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