So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Randomize