the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
