You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
