You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize
