If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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