My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
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