Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Randomize