do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Randomize
