im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
I don't think brook has ever known best
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
Randomize
