Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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