You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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