I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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