My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize