I want you more than these girls want KFC
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
