PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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