I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
