i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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