Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
i would punch a child for taco bell
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Randomize
