well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
