I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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