It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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