Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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