walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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