I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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