I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
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