sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
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